Jesus saves

It takes a while before things get sorted
I wished God had chosen a different path to how I feel now
It is not the right thing to do

Tired is my mind
The saviour heals my soul
I want to pick my battles
Leaving my doorstep
A reason to go

What do you say to a person who has attacked you?
I forgive you
Your burden is too hard to carry alone

Adore you,

Shivafeli

At least

It is raining outside
Yesterday disturbed me

Mix me up
You have not been calling my name
As serious
as I
.. no more times away
In my bed I dream of you to hold me -throw me-  fighting for the throne

You have mixed me up with someone else
How can you expect electricity
To clash the floor
When I am about to speak
You, surreal to me

Running cross the fields
Cows are sheltered
For thunder might strike
Taking them
Lights of the eyes, vanished

Breathing in silence
I am not risking anything to lose you
This pain inside motivates me to keep running, keep pushing
I will run through walls, punch them with my all
In this pace, the temper of my mind

While I should be dancing, with you
Sensual on soul, hips telling you what I desire
We do not touch yet you should see me
If it were for only us two

Crush me for I love you
At least I feel
I feel alive

Adore you,

Shivafeli

A glance

It has been two years since that first glance
Busstop in Delft..
One stop before the trainstation

You wore a white tshirt with print
In a red car you stared at me

When I glanced back your eyebrows lit up
I knew I am beautiful for God’s light shines through

How my heart skipped a beat when you were there at practice
A substitute teacher

I had forgotten I was told red cars anger agression
The world stopped when I first saw you

My pupils were probably widening
Yours were too
Maybe as a reaction to mine

I remember that day
The moments we spoke

Looks exchanged and everytime I looked at you
I found your eyes meeting mine

No make-up, no fit clothes, no beautiful hair
Practice is a place to be who I dare to be in daily shenanigans

You stayed with me
Reached a place unknown

Perhaps I will find a way for love
If it is with someone I look upto as much as to you

These encounters years apart
A stranger passing by
Standing to driving

Please God look out for this graceful man
The manliest man I’ve ever seen

Noble in heart
Your eyes stay with me

I don’t know you enough to say I love you

Adore you,

Shivafeli