It’s the sky today

Former
The lights were lit at a time the daylight was shining bright
Sun got us smiling today

It has lit me up like your smile used to do
It made me feel on top on the world
No insecurities
After I felt ugly around you for the first time, I never saw you since.. I needed time

A talk to the mountains
Nature and solemnly
With no words
Everything was given to me

An answer, the enlightenment

…. and weeks after that I never felt guilt for not stopping my brain to fantasize. .. I have never kissed or dated you… I have never been yours and yet I with my naive virgin brain had told myself mentally that I was yours

My.mind is stronger than the wildest for I have lost it all, even my faith before it was restored by God

Today I had a fantasy about two people
The special feeling you used to gave me was there
You were not in it
My brain used imagination to let me know that.I.could

The joys of love preserved to my heart
For it opens when God sees an opportunity or my eyes led astray

A fantasy for years has ended because you do not show that you want me anymore
It was all our chemistry was based on

I fell in love with the world and some of it’s people Today
To do good matters so much more
I don’t feel left out in life at any sense

I should never tell to just anyone I know that I’ve never was intimate with someone else than myself
Admiration for my own being
The older I become the more I value the happy feeling of spring
And my fantasies
Ten years of loving myself

For my imagination is better than anyone has ever described how sex between to people is to me
I’m sure you need to feel it
And if it’s an energy felt as lovely as the orgasms I give myself are

Or even this combined with the sense of another’s body
I’m sure God will grant me the best

Adore you,

Shivafeli

Ps. You just need to show that you want him or her

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